File 6

If I am honest with myself there are times when I am perfectly happy with being single. I enjoy spending time with myself and being able to get up and do whatever I want. To me, this is the easy part of being single. I remember someone telling me that you have to know how to be alone before you can be with someone else. I agree to an extent. The hard part about being single is when those spurts of loneliness start to creep up on you. This is where we must be careful as singles because it opens up a gateway to possibly make some questionable choices. So please be careful when dating and your loneliness is at an all-time high. It’s a disaster waiting to happen, tread lightly.

Being lonely and on the prowl (LOL), has caused me so much trouble but let’s not harbor on times of darkness. I know I’m not the only one that has been there, let’s be honest. We must remember Proverbs 18:22, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord.” The number one advice that women in successful relationships tell me, is that they were not looking for their mate, he came on his own. This is in no way me, advising anyone not to shoot their shot because you only live once. Between you and me, I’m gonna keep shooting mine too! I keep missing though,lol.

Which leads me to dating while single and saved.

I agree it is a test of faith because it makes the eligible men/women slimmer. Then you add other factors and it at times, just makes you cringe. I have found myself interested in some very eligible men but then I notice things that make my intuition and discernment go off the radar. Then it’s back to square one and a repeat of the cycle. My honest advice is to keep the faith, guard your heart and if something seems off, follow your gut. 

You don't want to give anyone that undermines your values a chance at your heart. During this journey of purity I have had times where failed relationships have made me resentful of saving myself. I had to evaluate why I was doing this and why it means so much to me. Being careful in who I give my attention to or who I allow to show me attention, has been something that I am very intentional with now. When I tell you that my block game is strong, it is. I will block you through every outlet that I know how and that's not me being mean or petty, its me protecting Shatia. At the end of the day, if someone doesn't show that they see your worth or that they value your time, its deuces!

My Pastor gave a great sermon on Sunday, that I believe pertains to this file. The scripture was Matthew 7:6, "Don't waste what is holy on people who are unholy. Don't throw your pearls to pigs. They will trample the pearls, then turn and attack you. (NIV)" 

You are a child of God and that means you are set apart from unholy things and people. Thinking about this scripture in terms of purity, singleness, and dating means you have something special that you should share with the right person. In such a sexual world, its hard for some people to understand and respect this. This goes for unsaved and saved people as well because if we are being honest there are some saved folks who have a whole lot of hell in them. Don't sacrifice yourself and the love you have to give for the wrong person.

If you would like to contribute to the Attendre files please send all thoughts and words to ssmarie1920@gmail.com. 

Don't throw those pearls to the wrong person, clutch em girl!

-Attendre