Today’s file is dedicated to a new podcast called Trill Tea
which I have fallen in love with. I was very interested in episode 5 which is
cleverly titled “You “Celi”bate, I’m Buying a Bit. I could not wait to share my
reactions and the actual podcast on The Attendre Files. The link to the podcast is below but please be
aware that there is some choice language used, if that sort of thing offends
you.
I enjoyed listening to this episode and just jotted down
some notes as I listened but I really did like the perspectives of the host
and the guest. Before I dig in to my thoughts, I do want to say that I loved
how the participants were able to have a mature conversation about this topic
and still respect each other’s opinions.
Towards the beginning of the episode, the question was
raised as to how much of a role did “Religion” play in the guest’s choice to be
celibate. It just made me stop and really ponder on why I have made the choice
to save myself. When I was younger, religion did play a big role up until high
school. While in high school I did attempt to try and set some things in motion
trying to fit in with some friends. But you know what, God blocked it! As I
have gotten older I have a deeper understanding as to why I want to wait but it
is not just directly tied to trying to please God. Shocker! It’s more of a
personal choice now. That’s a conversation for a different file.
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Amen, to God with the block of a lifetime! |
But look, when they were discussing the reactions that they
get, when telling women and men that they are celibate, I was like, yes Sis, that’s
dead on! Women do tend to always say, “I wish I would have waited or I admire
you for that.” And men, well sis let me tell you, it’s always a mixed reaction but
most of the time they sit there in disbelief, lol. I guess just because it’s
not a common thing in today’s society and then they are even more dumbfounded
when I tell them that I have several friends that are virgins as well. I just laugh, sir get your ish together.
Ashley, I will say that one of the hardest things about this
journey is seeing a fine man when your hormones are out of control, lol. Girl,
I feel you! Seriously, for me the hardest thing is fighting temptation,
especially when you want to say yes but you decide to stay strong. Reason
always wins for me but I have been close to saying YOLO! Judge me not!
I also made a connection when they discussed being a Sapiosexual and
was wondering if that is a common thing among virgins. Since I have never had
sex, I don’t really know what I am missing.
I am lying, I know I am missing something very satisfying, lol. I am
very attracted to intelligence because I love a man that can teach me
something. That is sexy! Show me all sides of you, boo and if my crush is reading this right now, hey boo!
I can’t say enough, how much I enjoyed hearing the different
perspectives because it was nice. There was no shame thrown, maybe a little
shade when they started discussing the makeup tips and dude went on and on
about loving a natural face. He got a major side eye from me on that but I was
impressed with his answers about practicing celibacy. He doesn’t believe in
marriage but when the right woman comes a long, that’s changing for sure and he
is not going to know what hit him! Same goes for the young lady who says
that she is mean, there is a man coming that will be willing to knock down
those walls. Sometimes being mean is just a coping mechanism. At the same time, its ok to just not want to be with anyone.
Towards the end of the conversation, Amani gave a little
nugget of wisdom because that just what Divas do ;) She stated, “If you are
not whole, you can’t give away pieces of yourself.” Had me in my room, like “Yes,
Sis speak that!” You can’t be out here just giving pieces of you away, you are
the treasure. Only give the goods to people who deserve it. It doesn’t matter if
that means saving yourself,being celibate or choosing the right partner, just make sure that you’re always
solid.
If you would like to contribute in any way to The Attendre
Files, please submit your thoughts to ssmarie1920@gmail.com
Major Key Alert! You will be worth the wait!
-Attendre